I feel like we really need to bring back Glam Rock. I mean, weren’t they the greatest, not merely musically, but they understood something about a performance. About an experience far greater than great sound alone. They created a time when Gods roamed the planet, in tour buses like chariots riding with their hair in the wind and thundering miracles and holy sacrifices, offering paradises and unholy fates, issuing forth blessed and damned fates to the lives of the masses. I mean can there be a hero greater than a Ziggy Stardust David Bowie, I mean even The Beatles were visual, Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band was truly ProtoGlammish. If we relate this to an elf or faerie glimmer, Bowie was still the Goblin King, A Glimmer Glammer you could say. Or a Glammer Glimmer. Aww yes, or the Glamour Glimmer. Oh yes, the Glamour Glimmer. The most Glamorous of the Glimmers. Of all the Glimmers the most Glamorous. Tis the Glamour of Glitter. Mean you Glimmer? Or the Glamour of Glitter. The Glitter of Glimmer is Glamour, the Glamour of Glimmer is Glitter . The Glimmer of Glitter is Glamour, the Glimmer of Glamour is Glitter. Ahh the Glimmer of Glamour IS Glitter! Is made of Glitter. And isn’t Glitter glamourous? Glitter is glamorous. Then we are agreed: Glitter is glamorous and the Glimmer of Glamour is made of Glitter, so then The Glamourous Glimmer of Glitter is a glamourous Glitter Glimmer. Aye.
And now a short NEWDictionary of Slang to be coveted, used awkwardly though self assuredly, and finally scoffed at once it becomes cool, by then hipster Thomas Riddle and finally by the wizard formerly known as “he who shall be not be named”
-Approval of talent, style, skill or successfully completing an action or function.
-exclamation of success usually referring to oneself.
-Not always noteworthy success, but praise regardless for any success whether large or small, one’s own or another’s.
After crunching out the numbers in your head without the check notepad, you finally, having finished the total pre-tax addition problem, before pressing the tax+ button, emit a single beautiful word “finesse” at your
-Disapproval, public shaming, disgust.
-Unhealthy, unhygenic, malnourished, dingy, disasterous.
-Natural exclamation and/or aversion to the unnatural or any of the above. ”she took of her pants and I was all like… goo… it was all bad, man, downstairs you know?”.
Other new phrases include:
“Oh I’m absolutely french-tickled!”
“I’ve been tingled!”
“Her damsel’s white garments”
“My tax dollars!” (in the same vein as “My Ass!” or “Bullshit!”)
“Your mother was an Auntish Crab Finger”
“The Arabian Double Head”
“She got Vampire-Weekended” (As in, she is a fan, devotee or believer of utter bullshit)
“Oh, my, Rottweiler God got dinglebearied!” (originally what it sounds like, contemporaneously: exclamation of shock, see also “my god got dingled”)
“I’d rather be reading 1984”
“Proud Patty Cherry Popper” (One whom relishes in de-virginizing virgins)
“A sailor mate”
“a gruff buddy”
“A tummy nuzzler” (usually kittens)
“Cod dweller” (vulgar, penis)
“Mungtuckling Mandweller” (Vulgar Vulva)
“Vulgar Vulva” (vuvuzela)
“Thumsuckling nitty nobber”
“Vuvuzela” (unspeakable terror, shame. Alternatively, peeing the bed.)
“Neither do Comedians”
“You see how I did that? Comedy always comes full circle.”
“First Circle” (as in “nah dude, I can’t go out tonight, I gotta First Circle in the morning.” alternatively “I’m totally gonna First Circle his ass.”)
“A Right Rounded Republipolitan.” (as in “she’s a right rounded republipolitan. She voted Nader.”)
“A Trampy Damp Douser.” (one skilled in finding/acquiring free drinks)
“Trampy” (usually, and most politely used as an exclamation of approval of hot, dirty older women, classically slutty sugar mommas, loose barmaiden or MILFish cugars.)
Now for more nonsense.
Something I’ve had the end of my writing reticule whatever they call this blinking line the semi colon becomes whole : The Beatles brought on
by your powers combined, I am Captain Planet Underpants… I’ve a weight problem these days and I’d be sinking if not for Atlas I’d be sinking without that wonderful man… But these days he seems so cold shouldered, he just seems to shrug everything off and oh I’m falling Atlas save me I’m falling, falling, falling fast through blackness and night forever, and stars only stars to greet me down my path and oh I’m a movie star, and then I explode into the side of a distant moon, three wolf was there and cried for me til the day I was born again from the gravity of my heaviest metals. Yes it’s all coming back to me, maybe I’m ok with being big, I’ll always have a great bottom! And a great top! Atlas doesn’t shrug so much these days. But when he does you know it’s just like falling onto a trampoline! Soon enough you’ll be falling again, but this time, the other way which is even more magical, and you bounce back with more fun. Just don’t bounce off the end!
I’m honestly very happy for Harry and Sally. Honestly I am.
I’m not entitled to a carving of a heart into a tree. I think the tree is entitled to it’s own heart, and unless the tree asks there’s no need to give the tree another.
So, if you want to carve a heart. Carve a heart with me.
If you need to have a heart carved. I can carve you out one.
If you have to have a heart carved. Take mine.
If you just gotta carve. Heart me.
So, if you want to carve a heart. Carve with me
we don’t have to carve at each other
So, if you want to carve a heart. Carve a heart into me.
If you need to have a heart carved. I can carve you out one too.
If you just have to have a heart carved. Take mine.
If you just gotta carve a heart. Heart me.
Valentines Day is over Tomorrow.
Here is the bullshit I find in my spam box. Anyone have a Spam spammer? One that spins? A spinning Spam spammer, that’s the thing.
Jessica Fisher pokeda says “The holding company� fights� their� cut of� those numbers and leases� them out� to other� cell phone� providers.”
Jayden Charlson donara says “Earlier versions of this deck are not quite as vibrant as later editions, so it is always a gamble when buying and the difference is very marked.”
Versicherungsvergleich KFZ says “Awesome! Its truly amazing article, I have got much clear idea concerning from this piece of writing.”
versace secret new scent expressions and fresh effects body mists Contrenadef says: “� And� find� out� which� designers� are� most� searched� by� your� retail� clients� on� the� internet.”
I really wonder what all the mystery is about. If the government wasn’t censoring every other word I think I could probably connect with Jessica and versace secret new scent expressions and fresh effects body mists Contrenadef, you know on like a human level.
English Majors don’t find me funny.
But neither do comedians.
I’m totally happy being by myself, it’s a lot of fun. I just wish there was someone else to enjoy it with. Two is just plain old better than one. But three, well now, there’s a number.